Scotland the what?

I was at a really nice party last night, attended by a wide range of very interesting folk. In order to protect the innocent, and with apologies for being so damned enigmatic, it’s probably best for all concerned if I don’t reveal the occasion which prompted this mid-week soiree. But as I mingled with other guests, as I do particularly engagingly after a couple of glasses of fiz, I found myself chatting to a well known face from Scotland’s television media – now I don't mean to face-drop, but this is one that even my mother would recognise! Anyway, being ‘guid Scots folk’, he and I immediately struck up a conversation on the pressing question of the moment here in the North of the Queendom which is – what tune should Scotland adopt as its official national anthem? Suffice it to say that this debate has occupied many column inches of our national press in recent days and remains, as yet, firmly unreseolved. Seemingly this very question had been the subject of recent discussions at his place of employment, and a colleague – whom he steadfastly refused to name but who I suspect is an equally weel-kent face up here – had come up with the obvious answer. Bearing in mind that an anthem has to be (a) relatively easy to remember, (b) strike at the heart of national identity, and (c) be timeless in the message it imports, the colleague proposed (and here I need to exercise self-censorship in case my Mum reads this)...well, let me just say it is a song frequently heard at national sporting occasions involving Scotland and England, is sung (always rousingly by the Scots) to the tune She'll Be Coming Round the Mountain but with a changed lyric. You’ll know the one I mean if I simply report that the recurring refrain opens with "If you..." and ends “…clap your hands”. Repeat endlessly...